RFNCARCP!
by Mr.Rogers Told me To-Luna N
Summary: We didnt know what to callt his so we named it R.F.N.C.A.R.C.P! Which means Rehab For Naruto Characters And Retarded Crazy People! lol its really long! if you can make a word/sentance out of it send it to us! Rated T maybe M later depends! Read and Review
1. Neji! Fer Sure!

**Rehab for the 'special'**

**Luna: **-giggles like a mad person-

**Rinniy: **…err…

**Ash: **don't ask Rinniy it will only get worse…

**Twilight: **omg I know what's happening it's finally come it's a-

**Luna: **CRACK FAVFIC BWWAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA-

**Rinniy: **GET ON WITH IT WOMAN!!!

**Luna: **fine!Fine! GOSH! –Mumbles- Roxas plushie molester…

**Rinniy: **what was that? –Holds up Alex- (will explain in the story)

**Luna: **nothing!

* * *

**Disclamtor(sp?): **Do we really have to tell you we dont own naruto?

* * *

**Chapter ****one: Neji! Fer sure!!**

_"Fer sure maybe! Fer sure not! Fer sure eh! Fer sure bomb!" _Neji sung into his hair brush in front of his mirror.

_"Pulled up at a stoplight, _

_D__id__ drugs on the dashboard,_

_Look at the__ mess we've made tonight! _

_Kick off your stilettos _

_kick__ off your stilettos and fuck me in the backseat _

_fuck__ me in the backseat!" _Neji started dancing and sing flipping his hair around.

_"__Your__ always falling in disguise_

_and__ always quick to compromise! _

_Kick__ off your stilettos _

_kick__ off your stilettos and __fuck__ me in the backseat_

_fu-fu-fu-fuck__ me in the backseat! _

_Fer sure maybe fer sure not fer sure eh fer sure bomb!"_ Neji danced around and turned up the music louder.

* * *

Mean while somewhere in the Hyuuga residence.

"What the hell is all that noise coming from upstairs!?" Hiashi growled under his breath. "Cant a guy get any peace and quiet once in a while?!" Hiashi got up from his chair and went up stairs to see what all the noise was about.

* * *

When Hiashi got up stairs he saw Hinata standing in front of the cause of the noise. Neji's room door. "F-father, I've b-b-been knocking o-o-on Neji's door but I don't think h-h-h-he hears me…" Hinata said quietly. Everyone in the house knew to NEVER go in Neji's room without knocking but for Hiashi's silences he was willing to break this rule.

Hiashi opened the door to see Neji…In tight leather short shorts, pigtails, and a tight dark pink shirt that said in bright colorful letters 'wanna taste my rainbow?' Neji didn't even notice anyone came in because his favorite part of the song was coming so he kept singing and dancing.

_"That's alright cuz you know I love being with you and seeing you cry and that's alright! _

_SO DON'T LET GOOO! DON'T LET GOOO! NO DON'T LET GOOOO!_

_No__ jkjkjk lololol _

_I heart your fucking makeup _

_omg__ I love you hair! _

_Is that a new tattoo? _

_Did that __piercing__ fucking hurt? _

_No jkjkjk lololol__!"_ Neji spinned around and saw Hiashi standing in the door way with his mouth open and Hinata passed out next to him.

… … …… …… … … … … … … … … …… … … … … … … …… … … … … …… … … … … …

There was a looooooooooong and awkwarddddd silence before…

YOU!!_I WANNA TAKE YOU TO A GAY BAR!! __I WANNA TAKE YOU TO GAY BAR!! I WANNA TAKE YOU TO A GAY BAR! GAY BAR! GAY BAR!! _Then Neji threw a kunai at his stareo silencing it. Then Hinata woke up and then passed out again from Neji still being in the outfit.

"Um…" Neji started awkwardly. "I can explain?" Hiashi just stared and then another moment of staring Hiashi twitched violently, picked up Hinata and walked out of Neji's room shutting the door slowly.

Neji sighed. "…Fuck"

* * *

"I'm what?!?!" Neji screamed loud enough for the whole village to hear him. Hiashi sighed. "Neji! I've caught you doing 'this' 4 weeks in a row!"

"Pfft! Four weeks?!?! I haven't been doing this for four weeks…" Neji crossed his arms and his legs but then Hiashi gave him a 'see look at what your doing' look so Neji uncrossed his legs looking embarrassed.

"Ok so maybe I've been doing 'that' but not for four weeks." Neji said sternly. Hiashi pulled out a list and his reading glasses.

"Ok let's see. Week one Neji was caught dressing Akamaru up in pink girly clothing and painting his nails. Hiashi raised his eyesbrow at Neji.

"What?! I tell you he looked and smelled a whole lot better." Neji said in his defense

"Week 2 Neji is caught listening to Madonna, playing with dolls and spending long periods of time doing his hair in different ways and putting on make-up." Hiashi twitched at the last parts and Neji rolled his eyes.

"Week 3, Neji is caught singing 'Barbie girl', painting his nails and staring at guys…" Hiashi twitched more as he mumbled week 4 to himself. "I THOUGHT THIS WAS A PG-13 FANFIC?!?!"

* * *

Twilight: why do you always have to suck the fun out of the stuff I write! Never Lunas! Or Rinniy's! Always ALWAYS mine! –Pouts-

Hiashi: THEN KEEP IT PG-13!!!!!

Twilight: HELL NO!!!

Rinniy: -ties up twilight and locks her in a closet- I'll take over from here!

Hiashi: thanks Rinniy I thought I was about to have a heart attack keep doing yo thang! (Rinniy: I thought I said never again…)

Rinniy: AYE AYE CAP-I-TIN!!! –salutes- -thinks to self- _FOOLS!!! I'm no better then twilight!! MWWHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!!_

* * *

-Back to the story-

"Alright! Alright! I get it geez." Neji huffed. "I didn't think it was that bad…So you think I'm crazy?" Before Hiashi could say anything the door bell rang.

"Neji will you please get the door." Hiashi said calmly. Neji got up and rolled his eyes. "hn, Whatever."

Neji open the door to face two guys dressed in white coats and masks over there faces. "your Neji Hyuuga correct?" one of them ask. Neji simply nodded. The two men look at each other then back at Neji. The one of the men threw Neji over his sholder.

"WTF?!" Neji started yelling. "WHO DA FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!?!?

LET ME GO!

I DEMANED IT RIGHT NOW!

HIASHI!! HELP MEEEEEE" Neji screamed at the top of his lungs. Hiashi simply got up from his chair and slammed the door shut.

Neji eyes widen then he got really pissed and yelled so loud in the girliest voice he could muster, im sure the whole filage of kohona could hear him.

"HIASHI YOU HATING MOTHER FUCKING HOE DOUCE BAG BASTARD!!!I CANT BELIVE YOUR SENDING ME T-" Neji didn't get to finish his sentence when the white dudes in- oops I mean the dudes in the white coats XD anyway.

The men in the white coats gave neji a shot and continued to take him to the happy hotel. Neji last thought before he passed out was. _'Damn I chipped a nail…'_

* * *

**Luna:** -Stares at Rinniy and Twilight-

**Rinniy:** -stares back-

**Twilight: **-still tied up and gaged but staring back-

**Ash:** -claps hands-

**Luna:** -claps hands also- BRAVOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! –crys- IM SO PROUD!!

**Rinniy: **-bows- thanks you thank you! Now ppl leave reviews please!

**Twilight:** whon goved yos woukys! (Translation: Will give you cookies!)

* * *

Like really please review we promiseeeeeeeeee cookies! kk? 8D 


	2. Sasuke's SECERT diary and Peanutbutter

**Luna:** oyeah so we didn't telling anyone what this fanfic is about…

**Rinniy:** but doesn't the title say it all

**Twilight:** yeah but what about the stupid people who can't read?

**Ash:** if they can't read then why are they here…

**Twilight**: oyeah…

**Miyoko**: HOLY JEBUS ON WHITE BREAD TWILIGHT HAD A BLONDE MOMENT!!

**Everyone**: -LE GASPS-

**Luna**: since when are we French?

**Miyoko**: I have no idea…

**Rinniy**: no more Mountain dew for you two…

**Luna** **and** **Miyoko**: NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!

**Twilight**: …can we start?

**Ash**: sure

Disclaimer: do we really need to say we own nothing?

Chapter two

Sasuke and his SECRET Diary

Sasuke Uchiha was on the way to his house when he heard a scream… "HIASHI YOU HATING MOTHER FUCKING HOE DOUCE BAG BASTARD!!I CANT BELIVE YOUR SENDING ME T-" Sasuke almost tripped on his own feet. _'What the hell was that?'_ Sasuke thought to himself.

Two men in white coats carrying a very unconscious Neji Hyuuga, Sasuke decided not to ask and keep walking.

--At Sasuke's house--

Sasuke sat on his bed and pulled out his diary from under his pillow.

'**Dear Diary, **

**Ugh today was not my day! **

**First this morning I woke up late and didn't have time to finish my hair! (You know how bad I looked?). And today Kakashi was extra late. (I think he did it just to spite me) ugh and little miss forehead girl kept clinging to me! SHES LIKE A LETCH!! I HATE HER LITTLE PINK GUTS! She grabs on me so tight! Tighter then a pair of Ino's jeans, which look great on me by the way. ;)**

**Omg Diary I discovered some awful things today!  
**

**Gaara owns more eye liner then me! This is totally uncool! He isn't even as good looking as me!**

**IM GAY!! Omg **

**I like Naruto! Today I couldn't stop staring at his ass! During training I touched it and then pretend I didn't know! (insert fangirl squeal)**

**Nejis a boy!**

**IM NOT MEXICAN!!**

**I THOUGHT I WAS MEXICAN!!**

**Tomato's don't come from the tomato fairy **

**I lost my good nail polish and CHIPPED A NAIL! Omg!**

**Hinata likes Naruto! That bitch needs to back off!**

**Well that's all for today!**

**Two hot for you! **

**Sasuke Uchiha!**

**Wait it's too not two ha I caught myself see how smart I am :)**

Sasuke closed his diary put it back in his secret hiding place and went out to find Naruto. He was so excised to see naruto he didn't noticed the man in the white coat hitting over the head and knocking him unconscious.

--Hours later--

Sasuke opened his eyes to face white blindnessnessness…ness. Where the fuck was he and why was it so bright! And what was poking him? Sasuke turned his head to the left to face a blonde haired girl with blue eyes and a blue strip in her hair.

"Oooo! I think he's awake!" the blonde girl whispered.

Then the blonde girl's hair strip and her eyes turned purple. "No duh Sherlock." She whispered again.

Then changed to having a red strip in her hair and purple reddish eyes.

"Guys I think you're scaring him!" she whispered once again.

Sasuke sat up and stared at this blonde girl.

She looked up and said.

"Hey why don't cha take a picture it'll last longer?!"

"Who do you think you are!?"

Sasuke glared at her. She stared at him for a very long time before she answered.

"Er…is this a trick question?"

Sasuke slapped his forehead. Her hair and eyes changed to purple. "HE MEANS YOUR NAME YOU RETARD!!" She yelled at herself. Her hair and eyes changed to red again. "Ooooh well I'm Luna Nazumi! What's your name?" Luna held out her hand but Sasuke didn't take it and simply replied Sasuke.

"Sasuke what?" Luna asked. Then Sasuke had a brain fart. "Er…I think it started with U…"

"Unicorn?"

"No that wasn't it."

"Universe?"

"No"

"URANUS?!"

"…wtf?"

"….what?"

"Um let me think…Sasuke Uranus? What the fuck is wrong with you!?"

"...is think another trick question?"

Sasuke didn't even comment on that.

_Ding_

A bell went off and Luna started to grin like an idiot.

"Its…PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!"

"NOW WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT!"

Sasuke backed a way slowly then started running to the door, but before he got there some random girl with blonde hair and a aqua strip in her hair started singing and pointing at him.

"NOW THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES!!"

The door busted open and people flooded the room. Dancing and hanging from the ceiling eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. While Luna and the other blonde girl kept singing.

"PEANUT BUTTER!"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

Then Gaara of the sand came out of nowhere with a bat in his hands and started singing as he hit some random people with the bat.

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

"NOW WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT!"

Luna pointed to Sasuke.

"NOW THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES!!"

Gaara looked at Sasuke crazily. Sasuke tried to get away but he just got caught in peanut butter that was smeared on the wall. Luna and the blonde kept singing.

"PEANUT BUTTER!"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

Then a very naked Rock Lee ran danced paste Sasuke (who is still stuck on the wall) and Gaara waving around glow sticks which were attached to his head and around his waist like a belt (thankfully) covering his…er junk while he was singing.

"NOW BREAK IT DOWN AND FREEZE BREAK IT DOWN AND FREEZE! NOW BREAK IT DOWN AND FREEZE NOW BREAK IT DOWN AND FEEZE!!

Lee pulled Sasuke off the wall and started swinging him around. Luna the blonde took some of Lees glow sticks that were falling off and dancing with them as they continued singing.

"NOW WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT!"

"NOW THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES!!"

"PEANUT BUTTER!"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

Gaara's bat broke when he slammed it down on some guy's head who tried to take Gaara's peanut butter cookies. Luna threw Red black and blue markers to everyone and they made X's and O's on the walls. (That weren't covered in peanut butter and jelly) Everyone started to sing as they wrote on the walls.

"NOW TIC-TAC-TOE!"

"UH HUH!" Luna shouted.

"TIC-TAC-TOE!"

"LET'S GO!!"

"TIC-TAC-TOE!"

"YOU GOT IT!"

"NOW TIC-TAC-TOE!"

"LET'S RIDE!" Out of nowhere Luna and the blonde busted threw the wall in a go cart looking for Sasuke.

"NOW WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT!"

The blonde pointed to Sasuke who was being thrown around up and down by a crowd of people.

"NOW THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES!!"

Luna grabbed Sasuke put him in the go cart.

"PEANUT BUTTER!"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"PEANUT BUTTER"

"JELLY"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

"DO THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY! WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!"

Colored lights going off and on, flashing, while people were still coloring on the walls and on other people, then somehow they got a hold of neon paint and took paint brushes and started splashing people as they all sang.

"NOW FREESTYLE FREESTYLE FREESTYLE FREESTYLE FREESTYLE! YOU'RE STYLE!!"

Luna The blonde and Sasuke were driving on the ceiling. Sasuke twitched and yelled. "WHAT THE HELL!?"

Luna shouted back.

"WE'RE DEFIYING THE LAWS OF PHSICS!!" Then kept singing.

"NOW FREESTYLE FREESTYLE FREESTYLE FREESTYLE FREESTYLE! YOU'RE STYLE!!"

They fell from the ceiling but Luna kept singing.

"NOW WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT! WHERE HE AT!"

"NOW THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES! THERE HE GOES!!"

Sasuke Got up and shoved peanut butter and jelly sandwich in Luna's face. Luna glared at Sasuke's smirk.

"Oh! I see how you is!" Sasukes smirk soon drop as Luna picked up a gaint tub of jelly and dumped it on his head. Lunas blonde friend picked up sandwiches in her hands and shouted.

"FOOD FIGHT!!"

Luna eyes widen.

"Oh shit."

**Luna:** OMG CLIFFYNESS!!

**Miyoko: **OMG! WHO IS LUNAS MYSTIROUS, yet sexy, FRIEND!!

**Ash:** -hits Miyoko over the head with a news paper-

**Miyoko: **Ita! –holds head-

**Twilight: **WHY DID LUNA SAY OH SHIT!!

**Rinniy:** WHY IS GAARA SO DAMN SEXY!?

**Everyone: **…

**Ash:** anyway… Please review

**Miyoko and Luna: **WE'LL GIVE YOU COOKIE-NESS!!


	3. Pink Sun Dress of Doom

**Luna: **has anyone notice we really don't explain anything in anything?

**Miyoko: **i don't even know what you said but yes.

**Haruko: **same here.

**Twilight: **you guys make no since. If you don't know what she said then how do you know if the answer is yes or no?

**Luna Miyoko and Haruko:** ...what?

**Rinniy: **Twilight shut up your making my head hurt your not making any since!

**Ash: **Thinking makes your head hurt Rinniy

**Rinniy:** what your point!?

**Luna:** What is the point of us even talking?!

**Miyoko:** nothing!

**Haruko**: WRONG ANSWER! -Takes mountain dew and drinks it-

**Miyoko: **PHILLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!! -falls to knees and cries- T-T

**Rinniy: **Phillip?

**Luna: **OMFGWTFBBQ! HARUKO ATE PHILLIP!

**Ash:** you mean drank?

**Luna:** ...is this a trick question?

**Twilight:** everyone! You guys were wasting time...

**Haruko: **of course.

**Miyoko: **-sitting in corner- angst-ness...angst-ness...angst-ness...angst-ness...angst-ness...

**Ash: **moving on...

**Haruko: **WAIT HOLD ON!

**Twilight:** what now?

**Haruko:** has anyone noticed there is a lot of singing in this fanfic?

**Luna: **-glares- your try watching wicked then try to write a fanfic!

**Pairings:** NejiGaa, SasuNaru, ShinoKiba, DylHaru, JessMiyo, LunaSara, and SaiCho. Maybe more parings later.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh how we wish we owned Narutoooooooooo we would make him do dirty things on TV! MWHAHAHHAHAHAHA

* * *

**Chapter 3!**

**Food fights and Exposition!**

**Recap! **

_Sasuke Got up and shoved peanut butter and jelly sandwich in Luna's face. Luna glared at Sasuke's smirk._

"_Oh! I see how you is!" Sasuke's smirk soon drops as Luna picked up a giant tub of jelly and dumped it on his head. Luna's blond friend picked up sandwiches in her hands and shouted._

"_FOOD FIGHT!!"_

_Luna eyes widen._

"_Oh shit."_

* * *

By the 'oh shit' Luna just said you would think she was scared shit-less. Well you're all fucking wrong! Luna wasn't scared she was the complete opposite! In fact let's look in Luna's thoughts right now!

--

(Luna's Mind)

_'Oh shit! WHERE DA FUCK DID I PUT MY PAINTBALL GUN! OMG I HAVENT HAD A FOOD FIGHT SINCE LAST MONTHS CHRISTMAS JELLO! Hehehe there was green and red Jell-O everywhere! We all smelled like kool-aid flavored Jell-O for weeks! -Insert evil maniacal laugh-_

_--_

Luna thoughts soon were interrupted by various yells.

An angry lady with brown hair pulled back in a simple pony tail and beautiful friendly silver (not so friendly right now) eyes. She was wearing a brown skirt that went down to her knees and i short sleeved white collared shirt with a white doctor's coat on top. The lady point at Luna and yelled.

"LUNA NAZUMI!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!?" you swear you could see steam coming out of her ears.

Luna smiled. "Well you see Lucy-chan." she started. "I just happen to hear that there were new comers coming here and i wanted to be the one to give them the grand tour." She finished with innocent eyes.

The lady now known as Lucy twitched and yelled. "BULL-SHIT!" Twilight grabbed Luna and started to drag her out of the room.

"Lu-channnnnnnn. Don't be this way." Luna whined as she was dragged to out the door.

"WHY DONT YOU LISTEN TO ME?! I TOLD YOU! YOU WOULD BE LET OUT OF THE ASYLUM IN A WEEK!" Lucy screamed.

"But Lu-chan I got booooored and none of my friends are in the asylum or none are in the same asylum as meeee." Luna whined some more. (Luna: i do not whineeeeeeeee u lierrrrrs!! -pouts- Ash: riiiiiiight.)

"DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU'RE STILL IN THE ASYLUM!?" Looked at Luna out of the corner of her eye.

"Er... i think it has something about the jell-o accident either that or that time i got rabies and spread it around by biting a doctor..." Luna said sheepishly

"BOTH!" Lucy glared at Luna.

While Lucy was lecsherring Luna on escaping and all that crap Luna lifted up Lucy skirt and looked under as she walked. Luna smiled and yelled over Lucy's lecher.

"NICE FRILLY PANTIES DOC!" and after that comment was made all you could hear was a large crack then silence filled the air.

Poor Luna. She should have kept her hands to herself.

* * *

(Back in the place with Sasuke)

Sasuke was currently in a staring contest with Luna's friend that he was stuck with. Her hair was a nice golden blonde which went down to the back of her knees with as we said had an aqua stripe in it. Out of nowhere she started to hum. Then Sasuke blinked.

"HA! I WIN! GAARA YOU OWE ME COCO PUFF BITCH!" She yelled towered Gaara who was licking peanut butter from the walls. Gaara looked up and shouted.

"I AM CAPTIN CRUNCH BITCH! LEAVE A MESSAGE AFTER THE FUCKING BEEP!" Then went back to licking peanut butter off the walls.

Sasuke's eye twitched and the girl looked at Sasuke and spoke with a smile.

"HI! I'm Miyoko Nazumi! I already know who you are so no need to tell me Sasuke-kun!" Sasuke rolled his eyes then stopped in mid roll.

"Nazumi?" he started. "Are you related to that Luna girl or whatever?" Miyoko nodded.

"SHES MEH SISTA FROM ANOTHA MISTA!" she yelled right in Sasuke's ear. Sasuke rub his ears and turned his head right into Gaara's face which was covered in peanut butter and jelly.

It seems in the time Sasuke learned Miyoko's name Gaara had finished cleaning the walls which now look sparkly clean. Sasuke cringed and thought to him self. _'Note to self: Don't lean on the walls.'_

Just then Lucy came back in with a tiny blush across her face. She cleared her throat and spoke slowly.

"Okay everyone please sit in a circle." As she said that everyone sat in a triangle. Lucy twitched and repeated this act several times but every time she got a square, rectangle, quadrangle, ect. She just stopped when they formed oval. Close enough.

Lucy began to speak but was brutally interrupted by a scream. Soon a silver haired boy with bright red eyes, around 14, came crashing threw the door in...

A pink sun dress...

"SOMEONE HELP ME!!" The silver haired boy screamed and ran into Sasuke 'gracefully' landing face first into Sasuke's crouch as Sasuke tried hard to not to scream out in pain, Neji came running in with what looked like make-up in one hand and a brush in another hand.

"Wait Uriu! I havent done your hair yet!!" Neji stopped in front of the silver haired boy, now known as Uriu, and the raven haired boy gasping for breath. Aberrantly the lights shut off and a spot light went on Uriu, who was still in Sasuke's legs...

"Boys and Germs!" Neji shouted into a microphone. Many voices of distrece and 'Oh no you did-n't just say that, girlfriend' were heard from the opposing girls in the crowd.

"Yeah whatever." Neji started in his dark green knee high cow-'girl' boots with buttefly flies stiched in at the top, capre jeans and his green tank top with a white button down shirt.

"Everyone look at my work! Uriu Miler! Sporting a spring sundress! The colors are fuchsia! And a spicy hot pink!" everyone looked at Uriu as Neji spoke. Various 'ooohs' and 'ahhhhs' were heard as Uriu ran away crying in shame, out the door.

The light flickered on and Neji joined the 'circle' (Haruko: -coughOVELcough-) next to Gaara who staring at Neji. Neji noticed this and leaned over to Gaara to lick the peanut butter off his cheek. Neji pulled back and watch Gaara blush a color that would put Hinata to shame.

Neji smirked. _I guess it wont be to bad._

* * *

--Time breaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaak!--

Lucy was getting impatient and very, very angry, and an angry Lucy was very very scary. So Miyoko got up from her space and took a deep breath then screamed.

"SHUT DAH FOOK UP!!"

Lets just say that they wont be interupting anymore. and lucy went on with her thingy er..speach.

"Well, im Dr. Lucy Mitsuki and im one of the main doctors of-" BRRRRRRIIIIIIIINGGGG!! Lucy was once again interrupted. Lucy threw her clipboard and screamed in annoyance.

"That's it!! I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!" Lucy screamed and flailed her arms and was destroying the room. The patients on the floor watched Lucy in awe. Never in there life have they seen someone quit only after 3 months. This was a new time record!

As Lucy threw a tantrum Neji was scooting closer and closer to Gaara and Gaara seemed to like it but this little get together was stopped by a voice.

"Everybody! Its tea time with-" the voice was cut off with a hissing voice.

"Good morning starshine! The earth says hello!"

* * *

**Luna:** CLIFFYS!! DX

**Miyoko: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! I HATE CLIFFYS!

**Ash:** cliffys are a form of torture….i like it…

**Twilight:** …wow you're creepy…

**Ash:** whatever

**Luna:** SHUT YOUR FACE! DX

**Haruko:** WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT!?

**Luna:** NO ONE KNOWS ANYMORE!!

**Miyoko:** ZOMFG YARN!

**Everyone: **WHERE?!

**-**Everyone pounces on said yarn-

**Luna:** -tied up in yarn- Please review!

**Twilight: **we might share our yarn!

**Ash:** only if u review –glares-

**Haruko:** DO IT!!


	4. I Am Not A Whore

**Luna: **Hey guys. Been a while huh?...IM SO SOORRRRYYYYY. -Sobs violently into Miyoko's chest-

**Miyoko:** -sniffles- J-just go...ROLL THE TAPE DAMNIT.

**Twilight:** -smashes the camera to peices-

* * *

**Disclaimer: We own nothing...**

* * *

**Chapter 4!**

**I Am Not A Whore**

Uriu ran.

Even though he had no idea where he was going he kept running. He dashed toward the stair case heading up to the 3rd floor. That's where all the windows were. Uriu liked to sit on the bench and watch the sunset. No one was around at those times, Uriu liked it that way. Making his way through a long hallway Uriu's pace slowed up as he came by the middle window where he usually sat. It was the largest window on the 3rd floor.

The silver haired albino slowed to a stop when he got a few feet away from the bench. He looked up and saw a dark haired boy sitting under the window on the bench gazing out the window. His pale hand reached up to unlock the window.

Uriu snapped his eyes close waiting for the wail of the alarm to sound but it never came. The albino slowly opened one eye and looked at the boy. He held a cut wire in his hand and a small smile of achievement on his face. Uriu's eyes widen.

The breeze from the outside blew in gently creasing the boys face and sweeping his bangs from his face. Uriu hadn't notice before but his left eye held a patch over it. The dark haired boy's eye was closed making him appear asleep. With each of the boys sleeping breathes Uriu took a step closer. Soon Uriu was right in front of the unknown boy. He reached out to touch the boy's hair when something stopped him. The boy's stare turned toward him and Uriu froze. He tried to move, he tried to look away but he couldn't tear himself away from the boys gaze.

He watched the boy reached his closed hand up and held it above Uriu's hand. The boy opened it and dropped something in Uriu's hand then got up and walked down the hallway. Uriu, left standing there with the item the boy had left him in his hand. He looked down and saw what the boy had left him a small round candy.

A skittle.

Uriu tilted his head a little and stared at it. He wished he knew what color it was.

After all Uriu was color blind, to a point where he could only see in black and white.

He squinted his eyes, it was a dark skittle. It might be blue or something. Uriu didn't care and ate it anyway, he didn't care he loved skittles. It was the closest thing he could get to seeing color even if it was with taste.

The albino boys mind was so focused on the skittle he didn't notice he was falling asleep. Little did he know that the skittle wasn't actually blue or even any color at all. Uriu never knew the skittle he ate was black.

* * *

DUN. DUNN. DUNNNNNNNNNN!

* * *

Kohana kicked open the door to the kitchen and shuffled in before the door swung back at her. The raven haired girl looked around the room before spotting her main target. The Refrigerator. She ducked behind a one of the kitchen islands rolling across the floor to the next island. She pushed herself against the side of the island, golden yellow eyes moving back and forth rapidly but always keeping her eye on the prize.

"KOHANA! Just get your damn orange juice and get out of my kitchen." She heard one of the Nurse/chiefs huff from outside the door. Kohana with a scowl on her face.

"Bitch." The raven girl whispered, giving the door the bird before opening one of the many cabinets and grabbing a paper cup. Her high pony tail swinging behind her as she made a sharp turn to the frige.

"EXCUSE ME?" The woman on the other side of the door screeched.

"Nothing Ma'am." Kohana answered monotone opening the refrigerator door pull out the clear pitcher of freshly squeezed orange juice.

"That's what a thought!" the woman gave a loud 'Hmph'.

"Feisty." The dark haired girl whispered to herself pouring the OJ into the paper cup, only stopping when she heard the sound of something falling into her cup. She looked down into her cup and saw a person who looked only 5 inches tall holding onto the side of the cup. The thing had light silvery hair and wide ruby red eyes. Kohana looked down at it tilting her head to the side.

"Thumbelina?" She questioned. You could almost see the vein pop on the tiny persons head.

"My name is Uriu!" He snapped. Kohana blinked. She started walking very slowly toward the door making sure she didn't shake up the cup.

Kohana made her way to a boy in a white straight jacket and sunglasses, a few bugs crawling over him but he didn't seem to mind. She sat next to a paranoid looking brown haired boy with upside down red triangles going down his face. He faced Kohana who sat the cup in between them on the table. The boy looked down at the cup with dilated eyes.

"Ahh..." Kohana says quietly. "So, it's not just me who see's this." The boy screams girlishly and picking up the bug boy swinging him around breaking everything in sight.

"ITS TRUE IT'S TRUE!" He screeches. "THEY DO PLANT GOVERNMENT SPIES IN OUR BEVERAGES!"

"Well…look at the time." Kohana says looking at her 'invisible watch'. "Great talk Kiba."

Kohana covered one ear as she walked away and Uriu sunk deeper into the cup of orange juice. As for the one boy who Kiba was swinging around, he looked perfectly calm. The dark haired girl was sure Shino would be fine. He was a strong one and Kiba would let himself hurt his best friend even under the impression of being attacked by the government.

**-*COUGH*COUGH*COUGH*-**

Walking down a series of hallways and padded stair cases Kohana came to a red velvet door and a giant black man standing in front of it wearing all white. Even his sunglasses were white. He peered down at Kohana looking her up and down in her white skinny jeans and white v-neck shirt wearing an untied straight jacket over it. Flicking her long dark pony tail from her shoulder she looked up at him with an emotionless face. Five seconds passed.

Then ten seconds.

5 minutes.

"Are you going to let me in or what?" she growled at the man in front of her who is at least a foot taller than she is. The man raised an eyebrow.

"Name?" He chuckled deeply. Golden eyes narrowed at him. She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him down to her eye level.

"Look into my eyes." Kohana glaring to the man's eye's as he slowly started to shut them. "Look at them." She whispered harshly ripping off his sunglasses. His eyes snapped open and he immediately started to shake.

"What do you see?" Kohana whispered into the eerie silence of the hallway that she created.

"Death and screaming! SO MUCH SCREAMING!" The man's eyes rolled to the back of his head and fell limp in Kohana's hands. She let him fall onto the hard tiled floor.

"Tch. Wimp." She said stepping over the body of an unconscious door man. Kohana pushed open the red door immediately regretting it. The blasting of music pushed her back slightly. She frowned at the sight in the room. People dancing all over each and swinging from the ceiling lights. Across the sea of people Kohana spotted the person she was looking for. The person she unfortunately calls her best friend.

_Most girls I meet are quite savage._

_Always trying to grab up on my package._

_They say I look yummy and they want a taste._

_But I'm a human not a sandwich._

_Sometimes I feel like LL Cool J._

_I need love not rubbing booty._

_But every girl I try to get to know._

_Just ends up trying to do me._

The blonde dancing in the DJ's spot pointed at the raven haired girl. And mouthed the words to the song.

_I said, I Am Not A Whore._

_I Am Not A Whore._

_I Am Not A Whore._

_I Am Not A Whore._

_But I like to do it._

Kohana slapped her forehead. She really needed new friends. The dark haired raised her hand in the air spelling out emergency in sign language. The blonde had stopped her pelvic thrusting enough to notice her friend. She pulled off her headphones motioned her friend over. She successfully made it out of the group of dancing people and to the blonde girl.

The blonde turns around in her spinny chair wearing a white suit her blonde hair slicked back and a cigar hanging from her lips.

"I'll make an offer he can't refuse." The blonde said with a smug look on her face. Kohana frowned places the cup of orange juice flavored Uriu on her desk. She raised her hand bringing her back hand down on her friends face like a true pimp making the blonde fall out of her chair.

"Don't give me another reason to hit you Luna." The raven haired girl spat as she watch Luna sit back in her chair with her hand resting on her injured cheek and a giant smile on her face.

"I can feel the love." She giggled contently.

"The feeling is not mutual." Kohana glared scooting the cup closer to the blonde. Luna tilted her head.

"That's Uriu." She stated blinking. The boy looked up at the sound of his name and gave a sign a relief. They were finally focusing on the problem at hand.

"You two know each other?" the raven haired asked raising an eyebrow. They both nodded. "Well do you know what's wrong with him and why was he in my freshly squeezed orange juice." She continued.

Luna picked up Uriu setting him on her desk fawning over how cute he was and poking at him. Kohana's raised eyebrow twitched in its place as she cleared her voice. The blonde look up at her holding Uriu in her hands.

"He's been drugged." Kohana's blue eyed friend said as if it was the most normal thing in the world as she continued. "It's called The AIW effect."

"What does AIW stand for?" Uriu spoke softly in a worried voice. Almost too soft to be heard. Luna pets the shrunken boy with her pointer finger as she explains.

"It stands for Alice In Wonderland. It shrinks you till you get an antidote." Luna says trying to soothe him.

"I feel that this day isn't going to end well." Kohana says inching closer and closer to the door.

"Uriu, I'm guessing you don't know who drugged you, and we have no clue who do it so there's only one way we can get that antidote and turn you back to normal." Luna said with an evil glint in her eye. She stopped petting Uriu only to grip down on Kohana's shoulder so she wouldn't escape. It was now Kohana's turn to look into the Eyes of Death.

"Oh _no_." the raven haired girl and the small boy exclaimed at the same time.

"Oh _YEAH_." Luna whispered excitedly. The blonde grabbed the paper cup of orange juice.

"RODE TRIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPP!" she yelled downing the cup of OJ crushing the cup and dropping it into the trash can.

"Oh _DUDE!_ That's gross there- oh god. You don't know where he's been. That's just- Just ew man. Ew." Kohana ended with a whispered. Uriu scowled.

"Bitch. I'm clean."

_**SMACK**_

"_OW!_"

* * *

**Luna:** -Holds out tin can- Reviews? Reviews?

TBC...


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